Notes on Hot

There's a reason each profile I write online contains the sentence, "Don't give a shit if you think I'm hot; save that bullshit for someone else." Sometimes it's, "Comments, like "you're hot", "hey stud", "hi handsome", "woof" or similar bullshit will simply be ignored (in fact, calling me 'hot' will likely piss me off; if you can't refrain from so commenting, be prepared for a negative response)." It's cuz calling a guy 'hot' communicates nothing; it is a reflection one man's desire for another. "I think you're sex-worthy" is pretty damn dull in terms of conversation, particularly since I ask a man to impress me with his sense of purpose and sense of self.

If some stranger tells me I'm fookable, I'm not impressed. So he finds me fookable; he may rent me for a tidy sum. Most often, the next thing out of his mouth is, "Use me, abuse me." And I am interested in this invitation to his selfishness cuz why?

When I tell a guy that I don't care if he thinks I'm hot, he often responds with disbelief or enmity. "What? You don't care if people don't think you're hot?" as if being hot is the only reason to live.

Sure, I'm as big a sucker for pulchritude as any man. But I have no reason to believe some stranger will be interested in that particular aspect of my opinion. Besides, if I go out to suck down a few beers and sink a few pool balls, what does it matter? I'll talk to anyone; that's the essence of socializing. Ya go out, meet folks ya don't know, spend some time engaged in pleasant conversation, enjoy their mere company. It's pretty ordinary fun, and I like it.

Personally, I think I'm kinda ugly, but I admit to a gift for making ugly look good. I kinda like ugly guys -- Harvey Keitel, Dick Butkus, Gunny Clausen, SSgt Farris -- because their faces have character. They are infinitely memorable; they have a timeless integrity. I don't show my face here cuz it got hit by a truck some years ago; one side has plenty of scarring, and part of my ear is lopped off. An ugly buddy will never lie to you; he has nothing to prove to himself or the world.

Okay, there's another reason I'm reluctant to show my face here -- I'm more interested in people responding to the written word.